It’s fine to allow girls to grow up too quickly!

Posted on February 11, 2011, by , under Family | Relationships, Food | Health | Beauty.

Too Much!Why is this a common misconception for so many?  I was reading over some Facebook posts earlier this evening and I kept reading the same thing over and over.  “I have to get ready for our Valentine’s Day party for school tomorrow,” or, “I am stressed and trying to find a few more Valentine’s Day games for my first grader’s party tomorrow.”  I am just a little beside myself why schools would push the idea of romance to school aged children.

Forget just the parties though.  Tonight while at the mall with my daughter, I saw a young girl who looked to be maybe 17 years old.  She had on a low cut shirt, with a much older looking boyfriend hanging all over her.  Her shirt was so low that it was completely obvious that she had had cosmetic surgery on her breasts.  I mean, they seriously looked fake.  My first thought was, why would a parent think that was okay?  An article from Focus on the Family highlights this very thing.  Many parents don’t realize what they are doing to their daughters by allowing boob or nose jobs, immodest clothing or even recreational dating.

Recently I have felt the urgency to educate myself more on this topic, as I have a daughter who is quickly approaching the stages where many other parents check out.  I don’t want to be one of those parents.  My daughter is too important.  I want to raise her to be a pure and holy daughter for the King.  This is a very huge burden and undertaking for me, especially with the world in which we live.  I have begun reading articles and having the much needed conversations with my daughter.  I take great pride in knowing I do not have to do this alone.  I have many family members, friends and resources around to help keep me encouraged and provide me with many great ideas.  Our church, Stones Crossing Church has an annual Royal Sleepover where girls first through fourth grade learn the importance of living a pure and holy life for the King. What a blessing to belong to a church who is willing to partner with me in this responsibility.

I am willing to do what it takes and to be the outcast to dispel this misconception.  It is not okay for girls to grow up too quickly.  It’s time for all of us to put on the brakes.

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4 Replies to "It’s fine to allow girls to grow up too quickly!"

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jamespurcell  on February 11, 2011

Great post…the obvious difference between “you” and “them” is priorities and strategies. You have a eternal purpose for your family, “they” see the whole world doing what they’re doing, and they have to compete to keep up. Sad, but I think it is just that simple. keep it up…you have a hard job :)

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Cherie from the Queen of Free  on February 11, 2011

Woohoo for the Royal Sleepover. I’m thankful we don’t have the Disney channel or Nick because so many of their shows have romantic overtones with the characters (that and we’re too cheap to pay for cable). It’s a balancing act, because I don’t want romance to become a restricted taboo that my daughters cling to because they can’t have it. But I’m also not all about letting them live a life of a 25 year old when they’re 8. I do allow the Eldest Princess to talk about boys in her class because I want to have open lines of communication. She once told me she thought a boy was cute, which I think is healthy. :) However, she does know that we don’t do the girlfriend/boyfriend thing in our house. Common repeated line: Not until I’m in college, right? And I’m still not sure about that. :)

I’m thankful she’s not gaa-gaa over the Jonas Bros. or Bieber like her peers. In fact, I won Bieber tix last fall and she was pretty nonchalant. “Oh, cool.” And at the concert was more excited because she could scream indoors rather than screaming for the concert. ;)

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Misi  on February 11, 2011

Good thoughts! :) My son is almost 12, and I struggle with the same thing for him. Last year (5th grade), some of his classmates were giving him grief because he hadn’t watched certain rated R movies they had seen (“Saw”, among others). When he told them he didn’t want to watch them, they left him alone. This year, I’ve learned (from another parent) that some of the boys in his class have porn on their iPods. :( I’m so glad that we have good communication between us and that I’ve already been establishing Biblically-based guidelines for him, so that even if someone offers it to him, he has a response. Thankfully, he’s made some pretty good choices in friends, and hasn’t had to face *that* particular issue yet.

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Kim  on February 11, 2011

All of these are great comments. It is true that we feel the need to compete, however, in my opinion, parenting shouldn’t be a competitive sport. While we have Disney Channel and openly admit that we really like iCarly, we have been very solid in our stance. One thing I can say is that my daughter is pretty solid in her thinking when it comes to boys and modesty, for now anyway.

Misi, I am very troubled with what you are reporting about your son. I too have a son this age and it just makes my heart ache that they are being exposed to this at such an early age. Call it being overly protective, but this is one minor reason we’ve decided to homeschool our children this year. I believe it is very difficult for a boy and it is my responsibility to protect his mind from these things that you have mentioned.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

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