New Steps

Mental Health: New Steps

“It’s the silence you hear when you feel no one is listening.

The face(s) you look at in the mirror as you see your tears glistening.”

 “It’s that large cup of wine, to feel released, relieved, or even relaxed,

but deep down inside, you know it doesn’t hold all the facts.”

“The loneliness you feel, because you think you have no friends,

 It’s those lies your anxiety, depression, bipolar tell you, to make you think it’s the end.”

“Could this be it, could it be depression? A temporary derail to take you from your mission.”

“This is it, can’t be it? There is still so much to do, but right now I can’t see, can’t feel, my energy so few.”

“I think it’s time, time to seek help,

I really think it’s time, time to choose this new step.”

-Nas Lewis (NSL)

Heart racing, Fear of the Unknown: Anxiety?

Still in bed at 2pm, Lack of motivation: Depression?

One minute I’m fine and happy and then the next angry and pissed off: Bipolar?

Pop a pill, down this 3rd glass of wine to black out: Self-Medicating

There is no time in history anyone can say, “My life was perfect”. They would not be telling the truth. So many of us walk through this life carrying so many different loads. But we have all been retrofitted to carry them. It is ours, but sometimes we get so down trodden and our loads get so heavy, we may need help. We all have times we feel down, worried, out of balance rather. We get feelings of hopelessness, fear, angers, sadness and even overwhelming stress that it feels you are drowning.

In this age of coronavirus and widespread financial, economic and social turmoil, many of us have tried to self-medicate our feelings as the world seems to propel from one crisis to another. With every aspects of our lives still not back to normal—and the constant threat that things will get worse again—many of us are struggling to find healthy ways to cope with difficult emotions, stress, and this uncertainty. 

Some of us turn to unhealthy habits to cope. You probably have smoked a (joint, loud, weed), to help you relax, (I know I have) or have a drink or two before socializing to settle your nerves and ease any anxiety. Or you turn to Xanax or Valium to help you sleep, ADHD medications to keep you focused during the day, or prescription painkillers to numb the anxiety and stress you’re experiencing at the moment? Does not matter what it is.

When you use alcohol or drugs to manage symptoms of a mental health, it’s known as self-medicating. You may be aware that you have a mental health problem but maybe aren’t aware of any healthier ways to cope. Or your condition could be undiagnosed and you simply use alcohol or drugs to cope with a specific symptom or situation. When I became a Flight Attendant, I used alcohol to cope with mommy guilt, financial woes, commuting, depression/anxiety and insomnia.

During the coronavirus pandemic, lockdowns and economic difficulties, many have been self-medicating our stress, worries, and depression as our old lives have largely disappeared and the future remains so uncertain. As of October 1st, 8100 Flight Attendants from my airline were furloughed and our lives changed for either the better or worse. There were some Flight Attendants who did not make it out of this “new norm”, may they rest in peace. But there has to be a universal way for us all to thrive.

While self-medicating may offer some relief short-term, over time it only escalates your problems. Whether you turn to alcohol, illegal drugs, or prescription medications (or even food or cigarettes), regular self-medication can lead to addiction, a worsening of mood disorders, and increased health problems. It can also damage your relationships at home, work, and school. Self-medicating can also prevent you from seeking the help you so desperately need.

But look no further, there are ways to cope. Healthier ways that can propel your life forward.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that you have no power against your mental health problems. But you are not. No matter what you’re facing, there are always steps you can take to change how you feel and improve your symptoms—with or without professional help. Most people with depression, anxiety, or stress, for example, respond well to self-help advice, like:

It may be hard, but reaching out for support. There is nothing more calming to your nervous system than chatting face-to-face with a friend or loved one.  Even in times of social distancing, you can find ways to regularly connect with family and friends to ease your stress and anxiety and boost your mood. You can utilize HouseParty, Zoom, WhatsApp, Facebook, Facetime. Just take a look through your app store, there are tons of FREE resources.

More exercise. Exercise triggers powerful changes in the brain that can boost your mood, burn off tension, and promote feelings of calm and well-being. Exercise can also serve as a valuable distraction, enabling you to break out of the cycle of negative thoughts that often fuel mood disorders. YouTube has a plethora of free workouts you can incorporate. Just takes discipline. Set an alarm each day to pry yourself out of bed and get started.

Trying a relaxation practice. Practices such as meditation, deep breathing, or yoga can help ease stress and leave you feeling calmer and more positive throughout the day. YouTube again has a lot of meditation videos to help you along. Even record your own experience taking a try at vlogging, someone could be impacted by your vulnerability.

Improving sleep. A lack of sleep can make anxiety, depression, and stress worse, such as mood disorders—and the use of certain substances—can make it harder to get a good night’s sleep. By eliminating certain substances and adopting new daytime and bedtime habits, you can break the cycle and improve your sleep at night. Shut your phone down, and try using an eye mask to get that natural melatonin started.

Journaling: This is my favorite way to decompress and get my thoughts out when the mind is racing. Journaling provides an escape like no other. You can be honest with yourself and write down all the thoughts that plague your mind. When your mind is filled, let it out on paper, then tear it out and burn it. Release it, don’t bottle it.

Find a Mental Health Professional: Therapy saved my life. That statement is pretty bold, but without this outlet I and countless others wouldn’t be there to write blogs, build platforms. Suicide ideations plagued me and many for years and speaking to a mental health professional is the best thing I could have done for myself. Take a stab at it and see how it changes your life. TRUST ME on this one. . 

Eating a healthier diet. The food you eat can strongly influence your mood. Cutting down on sugar and junk food, eating more fresh fruit and vegetables, and increasing your intake healthy fatty acids can help improve your outlook and boost your energy. You are what you eat, so take a week and try a different diet and see if there is a shift.

In different communities across the globe, we rely on something, someone, or deity to get through our individualized mental health issues and ways to cope. This gem filled note is to let you know there are healthier ways to thrive and live and YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Choose permanent steps that can lead you to mental freedom.

You can also do your part to support your family and friends and introduce these or other healthy ways to cope when you start to feel your or others mental health is taking a nose dive.

1 in 4 people will struggle with mental health at some point in their lives. And with the coronavirus pandemic and bipolar economy, many are in serial crisis right now. More than ever, people need a trustworthy place to turn to for guidance and hope. You can be that person, or place.