Balance
Have you ever tried the trick of standing on one foot to hold your balance, and couldn’t, but somehow if you bring the opposite finger of the foot you have in the air, to your nose, you are able to balance perfectly fine? No? Just me? No worries. I’ll be weird alone. Anyway, balance is the topic for today. According to Dictionary, balance is a state of equilibrium or equipoise; equal distribution of weight, amount, etc. So that alone must mean that imbalance is the state of being out of equilibrium or out of proportion. What causes imbalances? How can we be sure to identify when we are out of balance? These are questions that you wouldn’t ask yourself until you found yourself at a crossroad of feeling depleted.
Everything we do has its place in our lives, and we have to make sure we keep a good balance amongst everything, yes, even relationships. Marriage and relationships in general can become tricky to navigate. We have relationships with family, friends, loved ones, spouses and even children. Relationships at work, on boards we may serve on, activities we may be apart of. In some way or another, a relationship exists in our lives. Then there’s the most important relationship after and kind of in sync with God. It’s the relationship with self. Without having a relationship with yourself how can you have a healthy relationship with anyone or anything else in life? Getting to a place of balance takes time. I’ll admit, after getting married, and having three children back to back, balance for me just never seemed to exist. There was everyone’s needs that needed to be met, and everything in life that needed to be done. Or at least that’s how I saw things and being the person, I was by nature, I felt like everyone else deserved happiness and somehow, I’d find mine through serving (exhausting myself) them. I didn’t realize my breaking point until recently. I know self-care is very well preached, but not a lot of it is taught. In marriage you take care of a lot of things together, but you can only take care of yourself properly, well, yourself. It took a while for me to figure this out. My husband always encouraged me to take time for me, but I ensured him I didn’t need the time and that I’d be okay. That’s until I took the time. My self-care day included me getting a massage and going down to our canal to do some reading and writing. The results of that time to myself stretched for weeks. I felt good. I was nice to my family. I was nice to myself. I vowed that I needed to take time like this more often and not feel guilty that I am taking the time!
When the claim that impostor syndrome is real, it’s so real! When you’re not used to having a balance across the different areas of your life you feel like you owe everyone else the world, but in reality, the world cannot receive what you are giving when it’s coming from a disproportionate space. That feeling you feel right before life spirals, it’s telling you something and you need to listen. Spirals happen instances after your body and mind has already told you there’s something wrong. When we don’t listen to these warnings, we become accustomed to our life spiraling, that eventually we lose control. I get it. Self-care can sound so selfish. It’s not. If anyone loves you and cares about you, they know that you need the time for yourself, in fact, they’ll encourage you to take it. Balance includes physical, mental, social/emotional, and spiritual maintenance. Like tires needing balanced after about 5,000 miles, you too need a balance to extend your lifespan and improve performance. It’s up to you to understand when you need to sharpen the areas of your life, and how to do so, because you only know yourself, but don’t prolong it or drag time out to complete the necessary changes you need to implement. Your life’s health and balance is counting on it. Peace. Love. Blessings.
